HAHA... yes yes Hikaru, I'm updating my blog. Actually stuff happened but I didn't have any means whereby I can record them & transfer them here. So here goes (pardon my failing memory... turning 21 soon *hint hint hint* & NO!!! I don't want gingko biloba tablets to boost my memory. Gawd.
Anyway, saw TS & his gf both sleeping on the MRT, wearing matching red T-shirts when I entered the train @ Orchard w Ernest last Saturday. Just RIGHT in front of us. We happened to alight @ City Hall. Thank God Ernest was covering me frm view... man... got this shitty feeling. U noe, the kinda feeling when u saw that ex u dumped & u're feeling bad for being such a bitch to him? Anyway told Martin how suay I felt but must have sent the wrong msg across to him cos he was like " Don't do anything stupid ok? Don't rush into things." Aunt Agony. Think if it's anyone else who tells me that, I'll be like "C'mon!!! GIMME A LITTLE CREDIT CAN?!?!?" Had a great time w Ernest. Went for a movie (Magic Kitchen) & coffee @ Coffee Bean's. Where we proceeded to chat abt stuff. Found out a little bit more abt him... & yeah, made me see him in a different light =) Seems that we both share the same thing: we both want someone who we can look up to. Someone smart, someone whom we can carry out an intelligent conversation with. Then again... taking my time. Taking our time.
Well, just came back frm a date w him. Haha... shared w me some stories abt the grls he liked, the grls he had a little something going on back there with but it nvr did work out, grls that he had crushes with... U get the picture. & more imptly, how his perception of himself & relationships are rite now. Oh & he said this: He agrees that we're better off moving slow & steady. 2 reasons: 1. He feels that I'm not ready for another relationship. 2. He feels that he's not the guy who'll make me happy.
I feel that he's so right. Sorry frens, but I cant help but feel a little like, insecure if I'm even gonna daydream that we MAY BE (Note: I didnt use " ARE") heading somwhere. I see the MCP in him, the possible tendency for him to be over-protective. Traits that I dont noe if I can take it. Not after walking away frm a past one w MCP-ness in it. It didnt help much that he threw in a few comments my way. About how he's glad that we have this glowing (growing?) spark of chemistry between us. About how he has nvr dated someone he's physically attracted to & that it's scaring him. Ok it sounded like a compliment that time I heard it but still took me q a pinch of salt to swallow that 2nd comment. Great. Just great. Last thing I wanna hear is that a guy's going out w me cos I turn him on in that way & he cant wait to see me again, & it helped that I can carry a conversation well w brains up there. I noe Ernest is not that shallow, but... hell, he's a guy lor for heaven's sake. Temptations of the flesh r stuff they'll meet every other day, y shd he be any exception?